The ability to speak infinitely and keep it interesting exists within all of us, but why doesn’t it feel that way? The challenge is often tied to authenticity—without it, speaking feels forced or disconnected.
Authenticity is the magic ingredient that allows you to connect with what you're saying, creating a flow state where you're not performing but truly expressing yourself. One of the keys to unlocking this ability lies in the way you handle the topic.
Take, for example, Kate Moser’s experience when she received the speech title “Managing Upwards.” Unsure what it meant, she admitted her confusion and instead spoke about management in general. By embracing what she did know, she delivered one of the best speeches. The secret? Saying “I don’t know.”
Saying “I don’t know” is one of the most authentic responses you can offer. It allows you to explore your thoughts out loud, showing vulnerability in the process. This vulnerability creates connection and engagement. The same applies when you’re put on the spot, such as answering a difficult question at work. Acknowledge what you don’t know, then explore what you do know.
Authentic responses like “I don’t know, but here’s what I think…” are far more engaging than pretending to have all the answers. They invite others into your thought process and help forge a genuine connection.
When speaking in high-pressure situations, the goal often starts at survival: just say something and move on. Over time, it evolves into performance: delivering a clever or impressive answer. But the ultimate goal is connection. This happens when you share yourself, your imperfections, and your personal perspective.
The real opportunity when speaking is not about impressing the audience, but about learning something about yourself. Exploring your thoughts in real time can be risky, but it’s where the deepest connections happen—not just with your audience, but with yourself.
As you grow as a speaker, communication evolves. It starts as a survival mechanism, transforms into a skill, and eventually becomes an opportunity for connection. The best way to accelerate this evolution is to embrace risk and explore your own thinking, rather than defaulting to safe, rehearsed answers. Infinite speaking isn’t about knowing everything—it’s about confidently saying, “I don’t know, but let’s explore this together.”